Back at It!

So I am back at again, in keeping with the title of the blog I am back to the “chase”. It is safe to say the past few months have been extremely stressful. For those of you who don't know upon my return from Prague in May I began the job hunt and landed with a medical sales company in Madison. The job seemed like an answer to prayer at first. For starters it was a solid job in an economic time that is scary for everyone especially for recent graduates. It also provided me the ability to be close to my mother and father who with my father’s condition were very appreciative of any help I could provide. Another plus is it allowed me to spend some important time with dad as he continues his battle with ALS. Thus I was enthusiastic at the opportunities this position granted me. However I was not completely settled as my heart was still in Prague. The job started out fine but I often found myself lying in bed after work thinking back to my experience at TEFL wishing I could be back with my friends and the students I worked with. I constantly imagined a life in which I didn't have to sacrifice my contentment to meet the so called “status quo”. I imagined living for the moment rather then the future, a life of satisfaction. Perhaps it was a tad whimsical but it was my dream and that's how I saw it in my mind. I recall a conversation at a pub in Prague; a friend of mine told me that a "wondering heart" will never be satisfied. It wasn't long before that statement was ringing in my ears like a fire alarm. As the weeks past I grew more and more dissatisfied with the direction in which my life was heading. At no point was I sure of what I wanted to do but what I was sure of was that I didn't want to be doing this anymore. Thus at the end of December I left my job and decided to pursue other career options. To many of my friends and family this seemed like a split second decision. Maybe it was, but I have come to the conclusion that life is a series of split second decisions ultimately culminating into large decisions that push us down the paths we are meant to go down whether they be good or bad. You may not agree with that statement but it helps me sleep at night.

However I still had my doubts with my decision to quit my job as I heard more and more stories of people unable to get jobs due to the economy. I kept asking myself if I had made the right decision and that if the reason I was losing sleep was because I knew in my heart of hearts I had made the wrong decision. I was beginning to panic a bit but after consulting many different people on what to do I decided to return to Prague. I was going back to what I knew was my dream job fully aware that this life choice was likely not going to launch me into a life of fortune. I again began to panic as my entire life I was led to believe pursing an illustrious career was what we are supposed to do. Yet it was amidst my panic while mulling over one of my favorite books Walden Pond by Thoreau, in the conclusion I found an excerpt that put my fears and heart to rest. The excerpt read "I learned this, at least, by my experiment; that if one advances confidently in the direction of his dreams, and endeavors to live the life which he has imagined, he will meet with a success unexpected in common hours". So it is with this idea that I go I forward. It is time for me to advance confidently in my dreams and to realize them in the way I imagined. I do not know how my plans will unfold but what I do know is they will unfold and I am ready to face the challenges and successes that present themselves. So for better or worse I am chasing again and I once again invite you to come along with me as I try to figure it all out.

Back on track?

Jake